Sorta Pregnant

I’ve been sorta pregnant four times.  Being sorta pregnant sorta sucks.  It’s like you’re late, you test early, you see two lines, you go for a blood test, you’re pregnant, and then it’s JUST KIDDING!  The hcg numbers don’t double.  The outlook is bad.  The numbers come crashing down and you’re back to square one.  It’s a chemical pregnancy. Here are six reasons why being sorta pregnant sorta sucks:

  • You waste AT LEAST $50 bucks on pee sticks every time.  (Far too much money going down my toilet.)
  • You get your hopes up.
  • You might even tell your closest people and then you have to untell them.
  • You stop drinking alcohol.
  • You’re boobs still hurt.
  • You have to do it AGAIN?

Have you ever been sorta pregnant?  They tell me four times is a lot to be sorta pregnant, but I’m sorta on top of things (pun intended.) This definitely happened to our grandmothers, but they never knew it.  They didn’t obsess.  I always seem to end up with a kid in the end, though.  I better go dye my hair, get a keratin treatment, drink some unpasteurized milk at the farm, eat some coldcuts and do some sit-ups.  Hell, I better go crazy this Christmas and and get sorta drunk.

sorta pregnant


  1. 1


    Amazon sells HPTs fairly cheap. For the same amount you spend at a retailer store you can literally have hundreds of them. I have a few friends who keep HPTs in stock while they’re trying to conceive. My first pregnancy resulted in an early miscarriage on New Year’s Day 2011.

  2. 3

    Tara says

    Dollar tree sells them for….a dollar. And they actually work! Grab a dozen and you can use as many as it takes, and put the $avings towards diapers! 😉

  3. 5

    Julie says

    Does this mean you are pregnant? Or had an early miscarriage…i had a chemical pregnancy last year right before err got pregnant with chase. I miscarried on Jan 15 and got a bfp on February 12.

  4. 7


    I’m sorry, Annie. My heartfelt prayers go out to you. It isn’t easy each time. Even though the end result wasn’t happy, the love you have for the wee one is a beautiful gift. I will continue to pray for you as you try to conceive and deliver. Hugs.

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